[Reading online Awoken author Serra Elinsen] PDF author Serra Elinsen

Serra Elinsen ´ 3 characters

Awoken author Serra Elinsen

Ica can’t figure out why the gorgeous but mysterious new boy at high school seems to hate her so much It couldn't have anything to do with the strange dream she had the night before he first showed up in class could it The dream where the very same boy rescued her from a giant green tentacled sea m Not just the greatest book in history the greatest thing that has ever happened to humanity Ever Even better than Bagel Bites or the iPhone

free read Awoken author Serra Elinsen

In his house at R’lyeh great Cthulhu lies dreaming of herWhat would you do if you discovered you were the only one in the world with the hidden power to keep it from utter annihilationWhat if you had no idea what that power might even beAndromeda Slate the self proclaimed most ordinary girl in Amer This book is full of awful awful characters horrifying ethnic stereotypes godawful writing skeevy as fuck victim blaming rape culture bullshit internalized misogyny and probably the second worst fucking relationship in YA after Patch and NoraAnd it wasthat sounds worse than I thought it would WAIT LET ME EXPLAINview spoilerSo if you aren t already aware Awoken is a stealth parody taking depressingly common YA tropes to their disturbing extremes I wasn t sure whether or not to bring this up but as amusing and potentially calm threatening as it would be to think this horrifying shit was sincere I feel like you can t fully appreciate Awoken without the comforting blanket of parody tucked firmly around your brain It s difficult to appreciate the tropes being poked fun at unless you know that they re really for reals poking fun at them and that could potentially be hard to discern Not because the authors haven t gone above and beyond in making this shit ott and utterly ridiculous but because well waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too many authors have played the same shit totally fucking straight hide spoiler

summary ´ eBook or Kindle ePUB ´ Serra Elinsen

OnsterAnd it couldn’t have anything to do with that time she read aloud from that ancient tome of eldritch magic the Necronomicon could itAndi Slate never imagined she’d find herself in a situation where somehow she was the key to saving the worldHer life is about to get a whole lot less ordinary I ve gotten a hold of a copy of Awoken went to a Con saw some copies snagged one up for reading material on the way back home and I m completely blown away Maybe a bit brain damaged from the impact tooAwoken s story is about a character named Andromeda Slate yes really I use the terms story character and even about so you can understand me Like the Old Ones of Lovecraft lore mere words are insufficient This is not a story it s the frustrated fantasy of a miserable shut in Andi Slate is a piece of cardboard with attitudeexactly three attitudes really which boil down to nobody understands me goshwow I love Riley Bay and oh I m so lame compared to my boytoy I digress Andi has this dream in the Prologue which is probably the most poorly written part of the whole book off to a great start Elinsen where Riley appears all buff and covered in water like an eldritch David Hasselhoff And here we immediately see one of the book s greatest problems Riley Bay himselfIf Andi is bad Riley is worse Awoken s big sister Twilight at least makes Edward interesting than Bella In making Riley some god like being that tiny sparkle of life in this Edward rip off gets extinguished Riley isn t just inhuman handsome and strong He s a suid godI ll avoid spoiling any of this in case anyone wants to go mad from the revulsion brought up by this tripe Suffice to say that it starts nowhere and goes nowhere Well it does go to New York but it felt kind of hollow Has Elinsen even been to NYCThere are a few faint bright points The best two characters in this reviewer s opinion are Uncle Neil and Bree Uncle Neil is someone I d rather be reading about He s the kind of character that I would unironically describe as wacky and there are all sorts of hints that he s constantly having awesome adventures Naturally we barely see himI like Bree as well though half of that may just be pity She puts up with her hormonal demonoid of a best friend with a smile and seems to try her damnedest to give her advice that ISN T insaneshe s the only semi reasonable character in the whole thing It s like there was one last spark of rational thought in Elinsen s deranged mind and it decided to take root in the lunatic asylum that is this atrocityGo read something better Your local library shelves are probably overflowing with battered copies of the Twilight saga


10 thoughts on “Awoken author Serra Elinsen

  1. says:

    This is The Room of literature First of all You're tearing me apart is literally a line in this book though it doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of some of the truly awful andor bizarre lines of dialogue in this workSecond of all this

  2. says:

    May the bridge of the Lamb fall upon you

  3. says:

    This book is full of awful awful characters horrifying ethnic stereotypes godawful writing skeevy as fuck victim blaming rape culture bullshit internalized misogyny and probably the second worst fucking relationship in YA after Patch and NoraAnd it wasthat sounds worse than I thought it would WAIT LET ME EXPLAINview spoilerSo if you aren't already aware Awoken is a stealth parody taking depressingly common YA tropes to their distu

  4. says:

    Not just the greatest book in history the greatest thing that has ever happened to humanity Ever Even better than Bagel Bites or the iPhone

  5. says:

    This is The Room of literature First of all You're tearing me apart is literally a line in this book though it doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of some of the truly awful andor bizarre lines of dialogue in this workSecond of all this book is bad I mean really really bad In fact I don't think I recall reading anything remotely close to being this bad ever before in my life Why then the 5 star review B

  6. says:

    E E E E I looooooooooved tis book Riley is so hot unlike Edward Cullen e is suc an assat unlike Riley 3 3 3 3 e as suc Fatoms of Depth and dimensions and layers to im I don't like Andromeda se is suc a cold fis no fis pun intended I loooooooooove Riley 3 I would sare a filial pail wit Riley any dayI AM SO EXCI

  7. says:

    The uality of this train wreck uhh I mean Serra’s first attempt at a novel can be summed up by simply listing her charactersAndi Slate I’ll give Mrs Elinsen credit here in that “Andromeda Slate” at least seems have a semblance of an almost personality Too bad said personality is awful She is annoyed by practically anything She harps on about the tiniest of imperfection in everyone she meets whilst cons

  8. says:

    I've gotten a hold of a copy of Awoken went to a Con saw some copies snagged one up for reading material on the way back home and I'm completely blown away Maybe a bit brain damaged from the impact tooAwoken’s “story” is about a character named Andromeda Slate yes really I use the terms “story” “character”

  9. says:

    How dare this self proclaimed author smear Lovecraft’s name by dishonoring his creations with such a piece of trash Sarah completely misinterpreted the brilliant lore and completely disregards the original content of Lovecraft’s stories First of all Nyarlathotep the Crawling Chaos is an Outer God not a Gre

  10. says:

    I almost wanted to like this book Unfortunately since Uncle Neil was unable to ever complete a sentence my day was utterly ruined In the future Serra Elinsen would do well to remember that side characters like Riley and And

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